For several years now, I have been unable to successfully fall back into a rhythm of writing on a regular basis, be it via blog or bedside journal. I used to carry a notebook and pens with me EVERYWHERE I went so that I could document any noteworthy developments or simply jot my musings at the time. In my early 20s there certainly were a lot of musings!
For the past year or so I've been trying to analyze my seeming avoidance of writing to reverse the writer's block. It feels like the block is a coping mechanism, a wall that I have built around my heart. I used to frequently share my victories and distresses (no matter how big or small) with my loved ones via blogs (and of course conversations for the especially close, bunch) but I haven't been. What's on my mind, in my heart? Most of the time I don't know, myself. Perhaps the one I am most concerned with keeping out is me. I'm afraid to confront my raw heart, to excavate and lay it bare in front of Jesus. I mean, of course He knows what's in there. After being shut for so long, I have no idea what will come out as I unpack.
Please withhold judgment as my thoughts and feelings are my own. I promise to do my best to keep the private matters of other people--just that--"private". My intent has never been to hurt anyone through the course of digesting the details of my life. The fact is that many of you are on my mind and in my heart constantly. I am thinking of you and wanting the best for you. If you're hurt and I know about it, I'm going to be hurt too. Likewise, when you rejoice in life's blessings, I also rejoice with you.
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